SELF-CARE: When to Step Away
As hard as it can be, sometimes you have to step away from your partner.
The key word to describe your partner is not that they are gender-variant or transgender or DFAB or genderqueer or transmasculine - it is that they are a person. When it comes down to it, they are really just people - and that means they can be negative influences on your life.
They can be destructive.
They can be damaging.
They can be hurtful.
They can be abusive, mentally or physically.
It can be difficult being in a relationship with a trans*person sometimes because it can feel like you are the only person who really sees them as they are, and that you have a responsibility to continue seeing them as they really are.
But first and foremost, you have a responsibility to yourself.
You have a responsibility to care for yourself, and to keep yourself happy and healthy.
If you are being a caring, respectful and loving individual in your relationship and they are not being caring, respectful, and loving, then they are doing something wrong.
And even if it will hurt you for a little while to break up with them, if they are abusing you in any way, at least take a break.
Go away for a weekend. Spend some time away from them.
And if they are abusing you, leave them behind.
Leaving an abuser does NOT make you a bad ally.
Leaving an abuser does NOT make you a bad human being.
If you leave behind an abuser, you are being incredibly brave and strong.
You are not abandoning them - you are saving yourself.
another perfect post from Roxie at All The Validation.